Letters to the Simon
Our Readers Respond: Voices
By Our Readers
Aug 29, 2007

The Best and Worst Funny Radio Personalities

In re: your article, Funny Radio Personalities, a very small quibble. You define "shtetl" as a "Jewish ghetto." You'll please recall that the "Ghetto" -- arsenal -- district of Florence was the only district of legal Jewish residence; at best, this makes this makes "shtetl" Yiddish for "Ghetto" -- but they were both full of Jews.




Hear, hear.  I’ve always said that the only way someone like Michael Savage becomes dangerous, is when you don’t get the joke.  Kudos to the writer for getting the joke.

Confessions of an Adopted Child 

Really fascinating article.  But you kinda lost me with the last line: “one can never have too many parents”. Not sure how that sums up the story you just told.  Because, yes, one CAN have too many parents, because with many parents comes many mixed messages, and there is nothing more devastating to a child’s upbringing than mixed messages.  Consistency and leading by example are the keys.  So congrats on the journey for truth and the wisdom obtained, but your might want to rework your final analysis to fit the research.
Fraternally yours,

Gnomes, Smiley Faces and the Gay Debate 

When candidates make grand statements about “revolutionary” approaches to politics it seems one of two things happen.  They are either buried in an avalanche of negativity by other candidates and / or the press or they are labeled as ignorant simpletons.  Remember Ross Perot?  To some of us, he was a breath of fresh air.  To the established powers that be, he was a threat and was unceremoniously pummeled into oblivion.  Hey maybe he was on to something and that didn’t sit well with the “man”.  When commentary on his brand of politics wasn’t enough, detractors went after his smallish country drawl and his big ears.  It seemed the message was what could a funny looking, and sounding, midget, with no real political experience, possibly bring to the table as the leader of the free world? Indeed.  What about change itself?  Hmm. 
It seems all candidates play it safe with carefully crafted “tell us what we want to hear” messages.  The rules of debates seem to water down discussions as Newt Gingrich recently pointed out.  When the hard issues arise such as gay marriage or abortion, it seems the law background of each candidate comes to the forefront.  They answer in ways that have even the most astute of us scratching our heads and wondering what they actually said. They need to appear to address the issue while avoiding a stance that might alienate anticipated supporters.  Rarely do you get a clear picture of their true stance except when it’s an arch conservative or super liberal candidate who really doesn’t stand a chance of winning.  Think Buchanan or Nadar. 
Here’s where the true cynic in me arises.  I sit and wonder why the hell so many people cheer so loudly especially during party conventions as candidates make promises and pay lip service to their constituents.  It seems the vast majority of their promises are not met or even attempted after they’re safely in office.  Remember “no new taxes”?  Yeah. So do I.  Anyway, I don’t trust the process.  I don’t care for the carefully manufactured mudslinging and general bashing.  In addition, didn’t George Washington warn that partisan politics were divisive and ultimately destructive?  Why listen to him?  I mean what the hell did he know?
I’ve got to go now so I can listen to Obama talk about the challenges of growing up black.  Hey.  Wasn’t mom white?  What about that 50% of your existent?  Then there’s Hillary.  God help any of us with penises if she gets in.  I can feel the Castanza shrinkage already.  Rudy G.?  Fughedahboudit!  McCain?  Yikes!  Anyway, those are just my opinions which have not changed one bit with my minimal watching / following of their campaigns.

Nouveau Rock Ballads: Craftsmanship and Keeping it Real 

Good Morning

Nouveau Rock Ballads: Craftsmanship and Keeping it Real
In your article you mentioned that Kirk Hammett's guitar parts are good etc.etc. Please note that Kirk Hammett didn’t play even a note on Nothing Else Matters on the "Black album". All guitar parts including the solo was done by James Hetfield as well as the vocals.

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to get that off my chest.



re: Delilah
The whole song is dopey, but the line "You look so pretty, yes you do" in particular is a doozy...This guy talks to his girlfriend the way an eighty year old woman talks to her cats!
Seriously, though, Hoobastank's "The Reason" is a putrid example of the trend of monotoned, flat-voiced singers reaching for pathos and sentiment without the slightest hint of imagination or subtlety. The whole "bad boy trying to make amends" theme seems to permeate a lot of substandard modern rock powerballads...I like a good emotionally cathartic anthem as much as the next guy, but this "Hot Topic employee trying to woo his girlfriend by waxing maudlin" shit has got to stop.

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