First off, allow me to establish that I am not in favor of racial slurs.  The n-word or any other racist tag is not acceptable in any situation.  Just so you know.

That being said, the controversy surrounding Don Imus, who, along with his producer, felt compelled to call the Rutgers women’s basketball team “nappy-headed hos” among other stellar comments, has me wondering – why is it that every moron who feels compelled to exhibit racist behavior then feels compelled to apologize to Al Sharpton?

Don Imus is not the first.  Lest we forget, Michael Richards, better known as Kramer from Seinfeld, recently went on an n-word tear during his stand-up routine.  The words were no more out of his mouth than his agent was on the phone, calling up Al Sharpton, seeing when he’d be available for an apology.  Okay, Al Sharpton actually demanded the apology, but Michael Richards did in fact apologize to Al Sharpton.  

Even Mexican presidents are not immune from racism or apologizing to Al Sharpton.  Remember when Vincente Fox claimed that Mexicans come to America to do jobs that “even black people won’t do?”  He ended up apologizing to Al Sharpton, too.

Do you ever wonder what becomes of the people for whom Al Sharpton demands apologies?  The two men Michael Richards aimed his n-words at also demanded an apology – and monetary compensation, and no, I’m not kidding, Google it yourself – but they faded into the background as soon as Al Sharpton came on the scene.  I would have liked to have seen them on Larry King Live or even Countdown with Keith Olberman, facing off with Kramer.  Or wouldn’t it have been awesome, when David Letterman had old Kramer on his show, if he’d had those men in the audience?  And what of the basketball players from Rutgers?  They’ve been low-key since Don Imus called them hos.  Don Imus and the ladies from Rutgers have reportedly agreed to a sit down.  The only thing I can hope for is that it comes on air after his suspension is up.  Calling the team “nappy headed hos” from a distance is one thing – looking them in the eye after the fact is another altogether.  Of course, it would help if Al Sharpton could be otherwise occupied on that day.

In fact, all sarcasm and facetiousness aside, letting the people that celebrity morons like Imus and Richards slur spend their 15 minutes of fame enjoying a public forum with the offender without Al Sharpton to usurp and distort the issue should be the standard in apologia.      

And while we are setting the new standards for apologia, let’s find someone else to apologize to. Al Sharpton is unacceptable.  Apologizing to Al Sharpton is more ironic than anything else, when you consider his shining record of slander and racism.  Between the results of the Tawana Brawley incident and his on-record slurs against Jews, he hardly seems to be the go-to guy for the maligned.  Even more ironic is the statement that Al Sharpton made in response to Don Imus’ apology.  Sharpton stated that "I accept his apology, just as I want his bosses to accept his resignation."  That was big of him.  I wonder if anyone asked for Sharpton’s resignation when he called Jews “diamond merchants” from the pulpit?  Or when he was sued – successfully - for the slanderous remarks he made in the fallout of the Tawana Brawley case?

I hereby elect Jesse Jackson, who is number two on the call list whenever someone makes a racist remark, to be number one on the penitent speed-dial.  He would be a better choice.

As footnote, sometimes the moon is in the seventh house and Jupiter aligns with Mars and Al Sharpton does NOT get an apology.  Like the one he demanded last year from Cartoon Network for an episode of The Boondocks – an animated show about two African-American boys and their grandfather – for doing a disservice to the memory of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. by depicting him as waking up from a coma in the present day and, among other things, calling hip-hop artists “niggers.”  He apparently didn’t stick around to see the part where Dr. King was raked over the coals for using non-violent means to protest 9/11.

Cartoon Network and Boondocks creator Aaron McGruder did not apologize.  They acknowledged Al Sharpton, but they did not apologize.  Shockingly enough, Al Sharpton got very little press from this.  I’m not sure he even got on any major networks.